Mr.& Mrs. Morning Dove

Sharing nest responsibilities sometimes gets overwhelming. That's why Don will sometimes tell his wife Betty that he's going out for more nesting materials,  when he really just plans on sitting on the roof for hours.

A Wrong Call

Yesterday I woke up at the crack of dawn walked the dog, ran errands for 4 hours,  and then ran into my sister and her son at the grocery store. My nephew begged to come home with me, so my husband and I ran the rest of my errands and then came home and had to entertain a hyper 7 year old with ping pong, ball guns, video games, and non-sugary snacks and Mac photo booth. By the time his mother came and picked him up (an hour late mind you) I felt exhausted and brain dead. That's when I got a call.

My husband rushed towards me with a ringing cell. He urgently shouted "It's your grandma!" He flipped it open, "Hello? I asked" From the other end a high pitched voice responded "Hello Joanie?" I was confused and then suddenly relieved, I thought to myself, if she called the wrong number this will be short. I should have known better and I should have realized, this was no "wrong call".

Without a moments pause, my Grandma said "this isn't Joanie, this is Jayne isn't it?" I rolled my eyes "Yes, Grandma, it's Jayne. She cackled "Oh dear, that's strange your name is nowhere near Joannie's". I politely responded "that's okay Grandma, you just call your friend." I regretted the word friend immediately. My Grandma stuttered "Well, well yah know Joannie's actually my cousin, and I'm over at Tilly's and we're expecting her over..... 20 minutes later and two mentionings of how this whole call was an accident.

Finally I tried wrapping things up "alright Grandma". "Oh Your uncle Rob He only calls me when my bills come in. I have so many bills. Do you remember Frank and Margerie? They're dead now but...  Oh and the other day I went in my wallet and you know what I found? The ten commandments you wrote when you were ten?" She cackled "maybe that's why I called you, yeah, maybe that's why I dialed your number."    

Happy Birthday - Michael Scott Style

Trailer Park Memories

My Older sister Desirie practicing her modeling poses at the mobile home park my Grandma lived at in the early 90's. Grandma sure knows how to capture those wholesome moments.

My Older Sister's Idol

In 2006 my cousin and I visited my older sister and watched the Oscar's together. As we watched Dolly Parton perform a song that was nominated, her face got very emotional.

We stared at the screen. It was hard to get past the blindingly blonde hair, heavy makeup, collagen filled lips and super high facelift.  She danced around the stage in a skin tight white suit which emphasized scarily thin arms, legs and a 10 inch waist. Maybe most shocking of all were her disproportionately large breasts that made you think she would topple over at any moment from the weight of them. At that moment my sister spoke in a most serious tone of voice and said, "Dolly Parton has always been my idol".

My cousin and I just stared at each other with our eyes bugged out.

Birds the Word

A Gift for a Friend

This Birdhouse would make the perfect any occasion gift!